I've been taking a few days to make a new background image for my different social media sites. It's been fun, though I wish I didn't have to worry about censoring everything so much.

I feel the need to make these posts less and less it seems. I haven't been feeling as depressed as I once was.

Sometimes I worry that these drawings will be seen as creepy, but they helped me find happiness and they continue to do so.

I don't think that's how lemon wedges work, but for now I'm not going to worry about it.

The charcoal sketch turned out fairly well. I can see myself keeping a sketchbook of WIP images even if I don't use them for the final render. The water diffusion effect is new for me, but I think that's turning out decently as well. Hopefully this comes out well. Feels like the pumpkin piece.

I have to decide whether it's a case of Ray being very small or the teacup and whatnot being very big, as it will affect the physics of the water. That's one thing I always remember from Fantastic Voyage.

With today's piece, I am now matched for the most pieces submitted in a year since my time here on NG. Quitting SPNATI was the best thing I could have done for myself. I don't think I realized how unhappy I was until it was out of the picture.

The ability to work from home has not done my sleeping habits any good, it must be said.

I drew these tonight mostly out of a sense of obligation to practice rather than some sense of burning inspiration. Still they turned out pretty well now that I'm looking back on them.

I always envisioned this one being a black-and-white drawing, though it was going to be hard ink. I think I've learned I don't like that style so I don't want to try it for this one. I might regret that though, won't I? Now that I'm typing this... still, bird in the hand and all that. I hope I can do this sketch justice since it turned out so well. If anything the sketch itself isn't going anywhere, I suppose. I always get this mindset after making something so good that I'll never make anything better, but of course that's not true. The next good drawing is just around the corner, I just have to let myself find it. Might take a few tries, but it's there. It sneaks up on you unexpectedly, is the problem.

So much for AC commissions. Might try again after finishing this one.

I did a making-of video for the pumpkin piece:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vkegkza_o_U&feature=youtu.be

Hopefully having this will let me look back on what worked and what didn't work and will help the next piece go by more smoothly.

I've been thinking about taking advantage of the Animal Crossing hype and trying to do commissions by drawing people's characters, starting with mine as an example. Work hours have dwindled to almost nothing, so I don't have much to lose.

Late last night I took a look at this piece compared to my past pieces and tried to figure out its shortcomings. What I realized was that I was being way too heavy handed with the color. I went back and went with a feather-light touch instead, and the result blows all the previous tries out of the water. I think I've learned too that I like the thin sketch lines over the thicker ink lines. Still have to decide which one I want to go with, though I'm so happy with how the color is turning out that it's not much of an issue for me either way.

I tried experimenting today doing a rendition of the piece similar to the Kneesocks piece I did earlier. I like the comic dot look, but when I try to do it on the computer it usually winds up looking weird because the different zoom levels mess up how the dots appear. I think I'm going to finish the color version instead. Afterwards I want to take some time to practice my technique and rendering skills. Though I am still anxious to do that other sketch of Athena after all this time.

That leaves the question of what to do with this. I might post it on DA as a throwaway piece since I haven't done much over there.

It may be that starting tomorrow I will be temporarily out of work for who knows how long thanks to this damn virus. Part of me wants to try opening for commissions, but because I don't have any kind of following I don't know if it would go anywhere.

I can feel my confidence in this starting to waver as we reach the later stages. Part of it is feeling like the tool I used for the last piece isn't behaving how I want it for this one. Another part is just me putting too much pressure on myself to do well which always backfires. Maybe after looking at it later I'll see what I like and don't like. It's funny how a piece feels like the best thing you've ever made, until you look at it again a week later. Maybe it's good that I can accept that straight away, but I would like at least a little time to celebrate having made something without immediately judging.